I remember pulling into the parking garage, turning off my car and sitting in the silence, thinking, “Maybe this would all be so much easier if I just wasn’t alive anymore.” I starting thinking about all of the things that kept me going, the things that helped me push forward, the things that made all … More James conquers nuts.
I was crying the first time I saw a Georgia sunset. It was absolutely stunning. The sky was alive with blues, purples, oranges, magentas. And I hated it. I thought it was ugly and I didn’t want to even acknowledge that someone might consider it beautiful. I was finishing my one-way drive from Portland, Oregon … More Even when it hurts, smile.
I want my heart to be broken. And I want it to hurt. That gnawing, empty, breath-taking heartbreak. You know the feeling, right? I definitely know it. I’ve spent my life relentlessly attempting to avoid it. It absolutely terrifies me. But in spite of my constant efforts, I’ve still had my heart broken at least … More I want a broken heart.
I cried in the middle of a class. Again. That’s happened more than I would’ve expected in my life. This time, it was a Friday morning, before a really important exam. In medical school, we have these yearly exams to make sure that we kind of know what we’re doing when it comes to patient … More Maybe you are actually something special.
You were made to dream. Made to believe. Made to have unbreakable faith. You were made to put everything you have into something. Made to count on it. To rely on it. To know it will always be there. You were made to be wrong. You were made to be let down. Made to question … More Don’t forget what you were made for.
I’m terrified of flying but it doesn’t matter. I sat on the plane as it rolled around the airport through the thin, misty Portland rain. As the plane picked up speed and forced the rain to hit the windows harder, I felt the familiar sensation of gut-wrenching, out-of-control terror flicker to life inside me. It … More Airplanes, Loneliness, Heartbreak and Eye Contact.
I knew I was pushing myself to my limit, but I thought I could handle it. My plan was to take my first set of board exams to become a licensed naturopathic doctor on a Tuesday and fight at a Muay Thai event on the following Saturday. From the moment my school term ended until … More It’s not about being unbreakable.
I’m a second-year medical student. And a fighter. Some would say I lead a dual life. I don’t see it that way, but there is definitely a giant gap between these two aspects of my life. I end up feeling a bit misunderstood. The people I train with mostly assume that I take a part-time … More 5 profound life lessons I learned from losing a Muay Thai fight.
A few days from now, I will compete in my first Thai Boxing fight. Training for this fight has been pretty difficult for me. I’m also in medical school, which in itself is a pretty busy life and adding the immense amount of athletic training required for a fight has been among the most grueling … More I fight because I’m broken.
I spent years working towards getting into NCNM’s naturopathic medicine program. When I got here, I convinced myself that I was prepared in every way. I’d done all of my pre-reqs. I was motivated. I was confident. I knew that I’d have to put in an absurd amount of hours studying. I was ready to … More The time I forgot why it mattered.